Dear CWS,

Long time, no write! Sorry boys. It's just that this team... this team... THIS TEAM. You all are killing me, slowly and painfully. Seven game winning streak, five game losing streak, six game winning streak, three game losing streak. LET'S SEE SOME CONSISTENCY! Every single one of you is the same. The hitters are ridiculous for a four game stretch and then get shut out three days in a row. The pitchers are lights out one start and give up six runs the next. It's getting pretty frustrating. They way the White Sox need to win is the way with won in 2005... SMALL BALL! Not big homeruns. *cough* Not that Thome or Konerko can hit ANYTHING right now.

Seriously. Don't make me go batshit crazy on all of you.

LOVE,
E-Trainnn

Dear Gavin Floyd,

You, my friend, are ridiculous.

WHAT.A.BEAST.

Much love,
E-to the- Train

Dear CWS,

WEEEELLLLLLCCOOOOOOMMMMEEE BAAAACKKKK!

God, I missed you guys.

Marky Mark: WTF. Plz don't ever do that bad again kthanks.
Snack Times/Boone Lagoon: WOOOOHOOOO.
Dotel: BOOOOOO.
Thome/Konerko/Swisher/Crede/Zynsk/Dye: THANK FUCKING GOD YOU GUYS DECIDED TO NOT SUCK THIS SEASON (so far).
Cabrera: Way to be a fucking baller man, that was a bullshit call.
Casey Blake: Go fuck yourself.
Umpires: Go fuck Casey Blake.

Love,
E-Train <3

Dear CWS,

Welcome, Octavio Dotel.
Dude, how many teams have you been on? I was looking for a pic of you and there was at least five different teams you on. Let's check Wikipedia.

New York Mets (1999)
Houston Astros (2000-2004)
Oakland Athletics (2004-2005)
New York Yankees (2006)
Kansas City Royals (2007)
Atlanta Braves (2007)
Chicago White Sox (2008-present)

Yeah. Damn. I hope you don't suck.

Love,
E-Train

PS: Could you please kill Mike MacDougal while you're at it? Thanks.

Dear CWS,

Sorry for neglecting you. Welcome, Nick Swisher. I didn't like you at first, but now this doesn't seem so bad. We did need an outfielder. Congratz Joe for signing a one year deal. I hope you stay. Supposedly close to signing a deal with Octavio Dotel. I sure hope this happens so that our BP will suck a tiny bit less than last year.

Love,
E-Train

Dear CWS,

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

I hope 2008 brings playoff hopes and World Series aspirations.

Love,
E-Train ya brain.

Dear CWS,

Hello, Alexei Ramirez!
4.75 mil for four years... not bad.
Hopefully he'll turn out to be something.
If not... NO BIG DEAL.
I mean we're the fucking White Sox.
This shit happens all the time.
But it's cool. :)

LOVE,
Ya trade E-Train and ya trade ya brain